What!?! I mean, what!?!:

I saw an ad this week for something called the Rocket Fisherman, or Rocket Fishing Pole, something stupid like that. Anyway, the gist is that this pole casts for you with its push-button rocket action. Ostensibly, the pole was designed for children, but you know that the vast majority of buyers will end up being people too lazy to cast. TOO LAZY TO CAST! How much of drain on society do you have to be to order one of these? You know, I love fishing, but casting 20 times each time I go out is just too damn much. Plus, by the time I finish the 18 pack of “Beer” (the generic, supermarket swill that college students buy on Sunday when the liquor stores are closed or so I’ve heard) I find the whole push the button, move arm forward, and wait thing just too much to handle. I just wish that there was an easier way…Rocket Fisherman! Shazaam! My dreams have come true!

Morons.